The Config Report Terms of Service

(a.k.a. the fine print nobody reads but we still wrote for legal and comedic purposes)

Last updated: 08/11/2025

Effective Date: Whenever you first clicked “Subscribe,” “Follow,” or accidentally hit the wrong button while trying to close a pop-up.

1. Acceptance of Terms

By accessing The Config Report (the “Newsletter”), you agree to these Terms of Service. If you don’t agree, please close this tab, clear your cache, and pretend this never happened.

2. What You’re Getting Yourself Into

• Weekly (ish) content about patch notes, automation tips, and tech snark.

• Occasional rants about networking equipment, bad documentation, and coffee shortages.

• Humor so dry it might void your keyboard warranty.

We make no guarantees about accuracy, uptime, or the survival of your sanity.

3. Acceptable Use

You agree NOT to:

• Forward our newsletter to your manager and then blame us when they want “automation by Monday.”

• Try to use our patch alerts as a crystal ball for production outages.

• Copy our jokes into corporate PowerPoints without proper attribution (preferably with snacks as payment).

4. Data & Privacy

We respect your privacy. We will never sell your email address, but we may occasionally use it to:

• Send you The Config Report.

• Send you memes relevant to your IT pain.

• Warn you about updates that could turn your network into “CHAOS – DO NOT TOUCH.”

5. Liability Disclaimer

If you follow any advice from this newsletter and your network implodes, router bursts into flames, or helpdesk ticket queue hits four digits — that’s on you, champ.

6. Changes to These Terms

We can update these Terms anytime, without notice, in the same way your vendor silently “improves” firmware and breaks three features.

7. Contact

Questions? Comments? Rants about VLAN design? Email us at jj@theconfigreport.com or yell into the nearest switch port and hope we hear you.